Grieving mum Marie O'Leary was found dead near Herne Bay by own family after drugs overdose
05:00, 20 October 2022
updated: 16:15, 20 October 2022
The widow of a grief-stricken mum who took her own life after losing her son to suicide says she feels “completely lost and devastated” following her death.
“Caring and sensitive” Marie O’Leary, 46, was tragically found dead by her own family near a BMX track in Broomfield, near Herne Bay, after taking a drugs overdose, an inquest heard this week.
The mother-of-three from Hersden was grieving the death of her son Aaron Jermy, who took his own life in 2020, aged 22.
She had used the tragedy to raise awareness of male suicide, and urge those experiencing mental health difficulties to speak out and seek help.
But sadly for Marie, the struggle of life without her youngest son proved too difficult and she took her own life on July 11.
Her widow, Samantha O’Leary, has paid tribute to Marie - describing her as “caring and sensitive”.
“She always wanted to help others and was hardworking,” she said.
“Her gardening was her passion at the end, and she spent all her time there.
“She created a memorial garden for Aaron, and I have created one for her.
“Because of her anxiety and mental health, she wouldn’t really go out so all she did was garden.”
At an inquest on Monday, a coroner was told Marie had been reported missing on July 10, with loved ones and police appealing for help to find her.
Area coroner for north-east Kent Sarah Clarke told how Samantha was at work when she received a text message about Marie’s mental health taking a downturn shortly before 6pm.
“Samantha’s concerns were heightened when she saw Marie leaving the house via a Ring doorbell,” the coroner said.
“Marie was upset, carrying squash and a bag.
“She had also taken the car, which was not normal for her.”
Her family - who say they knew “something was wrong” - reported her missing at 8pm that day and searched throughout the night.
Police issued a public appeal, along with a CCTV image of Marie, as they upped efforts to find her the following morning.
Her car was found parked near a BMX track in Ford Hill, Broomfield, by her son. Tragically, her body was found nearby by her brother.
A toxicology report found Marie had taken fatal levels of prescribed medication - with a post-mortem concluding she died from a drugs overdose.
The inquest heard she had been struggling to cope with the death of her son.
The coroner added: “I know she suffered from severe depression and anxiety.
“Marie had a history of harming herself and this was exacerbated by her life events - one of which was the death of her son Aaron in December 2020.”
“I know why she did it - because of the pain she was in - but it’s horrendous..."
Samantha says her death has had a huge impact on her family.
“It’s been horrendous and my whole future has gone,” she added.
“I feel completely lost and devastated.
“I know why she did it - because of the pain she was in - but it’s horrendous.
“She has a son and a daughter, but also a mum and siblings who are all finding it hard to function as well.
“They feel completely useless because they couldn’t help her and weren’t aware of all of her problems.”
Marie’s son Aaron took his own life while experiencing drug-induced psychosis in a field in St Martin’s Hill, Canterbury, in the early hours of December 17, 2020.
Following his death, Marie bravely spoke out, calling for “more to be done” for people with mental health issues.
In an interview with KentOnline last year, she discussed how it is paramount that people seek help.
“Just talk - open up,” she said. “Because this is where it can lead to, and I don’t want anyone else to go through this.
“I know Aaron had a mental health illness, although it was never properly diagnosed.
“I used to beg him that he needed help. I had talks with him, I screamed at him, I cried at him.
“I always said to Aaron ‘I can support you, but you’ve got to help yourself’.
“But he would always refuse. He would never go to the follow-up appointments.”
“I had a text from him at 1.24am to say ‘I love you mum, I’m sorry I’m a disappointment, and don’t mourn too long.”
“The message she wanted to get across was not to bottle it up but to be open..."
Samantha has echoed her late wife’s words, stressing how important it is for people to reach out and not struggle on their own.
“The message she wanted to get across was not to bottle it up but to be open,” she said.
“It did help her when she talked to me about stuff.
“It did help her to open up and talk to people about how she felt.”
For confidential support on an emotional issue, call Samaritans on 116 123 at any time.
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