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Secret Drinker reviews The George pub and New Territories Chinese restaurant Teynham, near Sittingbourne
00:52, 07 June 2024
updated: 14:30, 13 June 2024
The first thing I saw was a Stella Artois T-shirt hanging out to dry, the next thing I saw was an empty Chinese restaurant, but I was sure I’d spotted a pub somewhere.
The George on the main London Road, near Sittingbourne, is a slightly strange, if not unique, drinking establishment as it’s part pub/part Chinese/part madhouse.
It’s in Teynham, but is far from tame, and whenever anyone either entered or left the bar the whole place erupted into complete mayhem – Uncle Fester’s entrance, following an extended period of absence, was heralded first by whoops of joy and then the whole pub joining in a rendition of the Addams Family theme tune.
Barmaid Trace must have realised I wasn’t up to full-on Friday night speed yet so apologised saying it’s not normally this noisy and pouring me a pint of Level Head IPA.
(Please allow a brief break from the review for me to say, despite my negativity towards Greene King’s flagship IPA, which is an abomination, this 4% session IPA from the same brewery is a delight).
Anyway, back to the mayhem and Come on Eileen was now blaring from the jukebox, with most singing along, and Uncle Fester was holding himself up against the bar with one hand while using the other to reach his Stella.
The majority of locals were sat on stools at the bar, which made it tricky for others to get served, but they were perfectly placed as they got their Chinese meals delivered directly to their seats without moving a muscle – they could eat, drink and shake their rear ends to the music without leaving their seats.
There was plenty of loud effing and jeffing and the music had moved through Everlasting Love by Love Affair to Smokey Robinson’s Tears of a Clown.
Two drinkers with hi-vis tops on their stools were first to order their meals and from that point on the strong wafts of Chinese cooking began emanating from the kitchen – someone with an expert nose could probably predict what was about to be served next.
The pool table in the room to the right was in constant use and the games were being taken very seriously but it was only when landlord Pete took to the table that the real quality shone through.
The pub runs two teams and Pete reckons the first team isn’t at all bad though he did add they can get a little ahead of themselves.
Why the discussion at the bar shifted to Barry Manilow I’m not sure but it led to Terry feeding the jukebox and treating the pub to a whole medley of the piano-playing superstar’s biggest hits as the jukebox was also cranked up to an almost deafening level.
What looked like raffle tickets were stuck to each pump and each bottle of spirits, and I realised these showed the price, although Trace seemed to charge £4.70 a pint whatever the ticket said - a Level Head, a Madri and a Speckled Hen were all her same favourite price.
When Bony M’s River of Babylon began blaring out, accompanied by the pub singers, the young lady taking orders in the Chinese restaurant had clearly reached breaking point and donned a pair of headphones. To the best of my knowledge no-one actually entered the restaurant to eat although in the pub a healthy number of takeaways were passed across the bar.
There was a fireplace, though it was filled with a blackboard, two fruit machines and the extremely well-used jukebox.
At one point we were joined very briefly by a young woman wearing gym gear, who did look to be in unfamiliar surroundings, but once she’d bought a bottle of water, she swiftly left again.
I ventured through the pub’s back door but the least said about the smoking area/back courtyard the better and it’s a similar story regarding the kitchen’s extractor fan.
The toilets are an interesting three-into-one affair with the gents, ladies and disabled facilities split by some lightweight partition walls – the hand washing area is universal.
It would certainly be fair to say everyone knows everyone else at The George and I was definitely an outsider, though to be fair I was welcomed warmly and even invited to play a couple of frames of pool before I left.
Trace is right, it’s a lively enough venue on a Friday evening and there’s no way she should feel the need to apologise for people enjoying themselves wildly – it’s great to see.
THE GEORGE, 76 LONDON ROAD, TEYNHAM, SITTINGBOURNE ME9 9QH
Decor: There are low beamed ceilings, a traditional looking carpet and locals dominating the bar on stools. It’s not going to win any interior design awards and is probably best described as rough and ready, though the locals love it. **
Drink: The Madri was absolutely fine, particularly at under a fiver, the Speckled Hen was a good example and it was very refreshing to find a decent pint of Greene King IPA (Level Head). ****
Price: In these days, where most pints cost the wrong side of a fiver, it’s good to see £4.70 being charged – this isn’t a bad price for a Speckled Hen, it's pretty darned good for Level Head and it’s surprisingly cheap for Madri. ****
Staff: Trace is an excellent barmaid and keeps things ticking over perfectly. She was equally comfortable chatting to regulars and visitors alike. Landlord Pete only arrived on the scene later but he too was down-to-earth and friendly. *****
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